The Maturation Of Relationships
Throughout your Pursuit, you will find the people in your life will change with the different chapters of your life. You only need to look back over your life to see these transitions. There are probably few people in your life who you were friends with in elementary school or middle school or high school or even college. I once read that we change our group of friends around every 7 years–I can’t find who said that or where I heard it, but it’s stuck with me for all of these years and it seems to be about right when I look back over the years.
When you transition from one friend to another, it does not mean you were a bad friend–well, it could but you’d know if that was the case. Instead, it represents the ending of one chapter where you served your purpose in that individual’s life and they did the same in yours. Rarely do these transitions end in a big blow-up between you and the other individual. We usually just see ourselves drifting apart–fewer hang-out sessions, not as many texts or calls, and as our lives evolve we slowly drift in different directions, or to get metaphysical, we move onto different planes.
And as we elevate (hopefully) to a new plane we find new individuals that just seemed to find their way into our life at just the right time–funny how that works, right? There is no coincidence that you find yourself spending time with a new friend or group of friends. They are there to help you in the new chapter of your life and you are there to help them–just like you have done in the past with other friends.
Last year I struggled as I realized relationships that were important to me were beginning to fade–I fought to try to keep them. I eventually accepted that in order to move on to my next chapter I had to allow those relationships to mature to create space for the individuals who would help me continue to grow and evolve. I was also reminded how genuine relationships from the past have a tendency to pick back up where you left off whenever you are around those friends. Just because you’ve begun a new chapter does not your friends from previous chapters are no longer friends–they just are no longer guides to help you navigate the current chapter of your life.
While most individuals come into your life for periods of time, there will be a few special people who transcend most, if not all, chapters in your Pursuit. Embrace this and appreciate the meaning of a relationship that continues with you from chapter to chapter. For those relationships that do not continue, appreciate the role you played in the life of the other individual and theirs in yours. The time spent helping each other was not wasted, instead, it was an important period of your Pursuit and you should be thankful for the impact you had on each other.
As you notice you are drifting from a once-very-important relationship realize the maturation of that relationship is making room for the next individual to come into your life to help you in the next chapter of your life. Appreciate the beauty of the past relationship, remember you will always be friends with that individual, and be excited for the growth that is coming to you with the new people in your life.
See you tomorrow and keep pursuing,
JC
