Minimize Regret
Life is a beautiful experience but is also fragile.
I was reminded of this today when meeting with a client to complete some paperwork to set up monthly distributions from his IRA. Under normal circumstances I would have sent over a DocuSign email to get the paperwork signed and processed.
But this was not a normal service request.
My client needed to set up a monthly distribution because he and his wife are moving into an assisted living/long term care facility next week. They had been living with their daughter for the last couple of years but their health had declined so much it is now time to move where they can have the professional help they need and still remain together.
I knew this day would come as he has been battling a disease for the last seven or eight years.
About a year into his retirement he started showing symptoms and over the years he has continued to get worse. Think about that…he worked 30+ years to get to retirement and one year in he discovers he has a disease that would drastically change his retirement.
“Retirement wasn’t supposed to be like this.”
When he said this to me it took everything for me to keep it together–it was the only time he looked me in the eyes while I was with him. I could feel his sadness. I could feel his fear. I could feel his defeat.
I didn’t know what to say.
Eventually our conversation made it to Roman, Leo, and Silas and my client perked up a little bit as I shared what they have been up to, but it was nowhere near the level of energy and excitement I’ve come to know from him over the years.
WE NEVER KNOW WHEN LIFE WILL CHANGE
My client didn’t mention anything specific but I know there are things he didn’t get to do and trips he didn’t get to take. His comment to me said it all. I’m sure he wishes he would have done a few things differently throughout life but there was no way to know this was the path he would be led down–finding balance in life was not what he was taught.
Work hard, save hard, enjoy life in retirement–that was the blueprint given to his generation.
That blueprint isn’t necessarily wrong but it is flawed. We’ve all heard the study of individuals in hospice being asked what they would have done differently and none of them said they wish they had worked harder. Their responses can be summarized into they wish they had lived more throughout their lives.
If you shift your focus to live more and minimize regrets, you are beginning to move toward your authentic life.
Living your authentic life to minimize regret does not mean you throw caution to the wind and recklessly spend money and energy. Instead, you should plan with intent. Intentionally spend your money. Intentionally choose your career. Intentionally direct your energy. By intentionally planning your life you are able to plan for the long term goals, like an enjoyable retirement, and experience life along the way.
My goal is to approach life to minimize regret in case I find myself in a similar situation as my client. I also want to prioritize my health even more. I know I can’t prevent every illness and disease but in addition to minimizing my regrets around living life, I want to minimize regret that I may not have done everything in my power to prevent disease--if it should happen, I don’t want to feel I knowingly contributed to it.
The connection of mind, body, spirit, and money is one of the most powerful connections you can make because it helps you identify who YOU are, what YOU truly want in life, and allows you to begin living your authentic life. Your authentic life won’t be without regret–it’s nearly impossible to avoid it. But, it is possible to minimize regret and put yourself in the best position to avoid the biggest regrets.
What are you doing to minimize regret during your life? Are you even thinking about it?
See you tomorrow and keep pursuing,
JC
